Okay, everyone, so you know I have this tech-savvy sister, Monica, right?! Well, she tagged me..which means basically because I had this little notion to read her blog this morning that I have to do what she tags me to do...which is to open the fourth folder of my pictures and pick the fourth picture and blog about it. Now, seriously, I am 35, I am a grown woman, I don't have to do what she tells me..really...but I am choosing to do it...because like her, when I saw what that picture was I started to just pick another one..I mean, who would really know which pic is the fourth in my fourth folder..well, just me and the Good Lord of course....so, here it is. Take a really good look. It is a pretty accurate picture of our life.
Actually this is a picture from Thanksgiving 2006--Al & Gina came by Mom's house to bring Connor his birthday presents (LOTS) and some special gifts for Kate too. There are many things I realize about this picture as I look at it..and how it relates to the big picture of our life.
As usual my Chad is there...to the side..graciously allowing this event to happen...helping take pictures and joining in when Connor asks Daddy to help him open something, and stepping back at times to let Al have a few moments with Connor---because he knows beyond all doubt that he has my heart and always will....and because he knows Connor is his, 100%....that is one strong man I married. If the shoe were on the other foot...I think I would be a psycho woman...okay, so maybe I already am. =)
Next, I notice my Connor, Connor Bonnor, my "Punkin Doodle" and I talking...we are always talking. Ask Daddy and Kate. haha We were looking at a present and talking about how cool it was. This will be the scenario between the two of us for a lifetime...me beside him, explaining things, hoping he understands, and praying he always knows how much he is loved...by everyone, even those he does not see very often. Trying to answer his questions, and still let the others in the picture keep smiling too, so there are not offenses on any side. You know, I prayed day and night for 2 years before I got pregnant with Connor, thanked God daily for him, on my way to work when I prayed, even before any test showed I was, I thanked God that I was...until I saw the 2 lines on that stick! So, to say any part of my life was a mistake would never happen. Each day, each tear, led me to where I am and gave me the beautiful family I now have.
As for Miss Kate, she's right in the middle of me and Connor. And still is. She loves to love and be loved and act silly. She rounds out the love in our family to make us complete. Connor is a visible sign of Chad and I coming together from two past lives and making a family...Kate is our love story in physical form. Amazing what God can do...isn't it? To take a bunch of pieces of messed up stuff, and put it together to form a love and a life you never dreamed could really happen! Amazing.
As for Al and Gina. Yep, that's them. Al, as always, laughing and cutting up. That is the side to him we all love. He has a great laugh. Connor has that same belly laugh that just cracks you up when he gets 'really' tickled about something. Miss Gina. Well, she's not with Daddy Al anymore, but she was a wonderful part of his life when she was in it. She saw to it that special days were not missed with Connor and that time spent together was the important piece in a visit not just the big hoop-la and presents. She taught me many many life lessons that I would not have learned without her. Because of her, I learned to lean on God...to have the grace and mercy to look at someone who you know took a part in the division of your family and still be able to see her, the person, forgive her, and even be a friend to her. Not a best friend, no, that would not be a good idea, but a friend none the less. It is because of the dissolving of an 8 year marriage, that I can have words of understanding for my friends that have since gone through divorce, that I can learn from the bad and be better this time around as a wife...and that is the reason I can take one look at my handsome husband, and thank God immensely for the life He has now given me, the life Chad provides so well for us, and then sigh a huge sigh and just sit back and enjoy a love like I never thought I would have.
Soooooooo, there you have it. You asked for it. You tagged me...and you got the long story..longer. hahaha
Oh, and by the way, the pic is at my Mom's house, which will always be home to us, its where I grew up, its where I moved out and back in several times especially during the whole divorce thing, its where I lived when I met my Chad and we were dating...its where Chad and I stay when we are visiting Paris, and it is symbolic of the fact that we are moving back HOME now, to Powderly in a few months.
Hug the ones you love and have a wonderful day!
~Kan
